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Oct.
2003
|
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Emotions
make life worth
living — even on Vesuvio |
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James
Pankratz
Special to Parenting |
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'Captain’s Log: Stardate: 2303. The Enterprise
is in the grip of a powerful tractor beam dragging us
closer and closer to the volcanic planet, Vesuvio. Unless
Scotty can find a way to break us free, our ship and all
aboard will be incinerated by molten lava in less than
an hour. With me on the bridge are science officer Spock
and medical officer McCoy. Kirk out.”
Mr. Spock looks up from the instrument panel of flashing
lights.
“Captain, data from the thermo-computer shows that
the mean temperature on board ship is rising an average
of 3 degrees Celsius every quarter hour. At that rate,
human body temperature should exceed 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit
within the next 7.5 minutes.”
Dr. McCoy throws up his arms.
“Confound it, you pointy-eared Vulcan! You’re
treating this like a problem in advanced algebra! Don’t
you realize we’re all about to be char-broiled!”
Spock turns to Captain Kirk.
“Captain, that I am a Vulcan with pointed ears has
been well known to Dr. McCoy for many years. What relevance
does that have in trying to solve our current dilemma?”
“It’s an emotion, Spock,” replies Kirk,
as he wipes beads of sweat from his forehead. “It’s
an expression of what we humans experience under stress.”
Spock picks up a data book and begins making an entry.
“More arithmetic, Spock?” asks McCoy.
“No, doctor. I am merely recording your expression
as an interesting mixture of the emotion anger and the
emotion fear.”
“Let me see that!” McCoy grabs the data book
and scrolls through it. “Mr. Spock’s Guidebook
to Human Emotion.” You have been analyzing my every
move during this entire voyage!”
“Not
your every move, doctor. Only your emotions. And those
of the remainder of the crew, as well. Someday I may have
what you humans refer to as a ‘bestseller’
on my home planet of Vulcan. So far I have cataloged the
following: anger, joy, caution, depression, fear, jealousy,
anxiety, suspicion, guilt, embarrassment, boredom, shock....”
McCoy lunges toward Spock and pins him against the hull
of the ship.
“And now ... hysteria.” Spock struggles to
make another entry.
“Gentlemen, enough!” cries the captain. “We
have a problem to solve here.”
McCoy releases his grip. Spock continues. “Further,
I have observed that you humans regard your emotions as
disturbing and uncomfortable. You attempt to respond to
them with a primitive defense mechanism called ‘repression.’
You exert great effort to push emotions out of your conscious
awareness. You resort to distractions, such as frenetic
activity, or addictions, such as gambling or consumption
of large quantities of foreign substances, to hide from
them. To no avail, it seems.”
Kirk picks up a call from the engine room. “Scotty,
are we free?”
“Negative, Captain. The dilithium crystals are almost
drained. Our doom is near.”
“Despair.” Spock makes another entry.
“You green-blooded mutant!” McCoy screams.
“Have you ever listened to a concerto? Or gazed
at the moons hanging low over Jupiter? Have you ever fallen
in love or held a rose in your hand? Emotions make life
worth living!”
“It is true you do have an ambivalent relationship
to your emotions. And incidentally, my green blood will
boil approximately 10 minutes after your own, doctor.”
McCoy grimaces.
Kirk moves between them. “Take it easy, Bones. So,
Mr. Spock, you’ve concluded that there’s nothing
we can do about emotions. We’ll be plagued forever?”
“Not so, Captain. I have observed that emotions,
like all finite matter, have a beginning, middle and an
end. Every emotion has an arc. It begins, rises in intensity,
and then gradually subsides. And if a second human engages
in a process of active listening, reflecting on the emotion,
the emotionally distraught person is likely to soon feel
some relief. I caution against trying to offer solutions
while the human is emotionally distraught. Simple phrases
such as ‘Hmm, Oh, I see’ are far more effective
in promoting emotional relief.”
“How do you know?” asks the captain.
“I have been practicing on Dr. McCoy ever since
we left Altera 5.”
Suddenly the lights on the instrument panel turn into
a firework display. Sparks fly. While the panic-stricken
crew runs amok, Spock picks up a copy of the Enterprise-NCC-1701
Instruction Manual, opens a hidden panel, and presses
the Tractor Beam Override button. The ship shakes violently
as it warps free of the deadly tractor beam.
With the familiar hum of the engines restored, Spock assumes
his position on the bridge. “Another observation.
Human emotion frequently interferes with the application
of logic necessary for problem solving.”
Captain Kirk looks at Dr. McCoy, who returns the glance.
Mr. Spock jumps as his comrades douse him in a large bucket
of icy, orange Galacticade. Hoisting him on their shoulders,
the crew carry him about the bridge singing “For
he’s a jolly good Vulcan!” Spock cocks his
head quizzically.
“Ecstasy. Most curious.”
(Pankratz is a marriage and family therapist at Catholic
Charities, Milwaukee regional office.) |
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