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April 2003
Develop a reputation as a slacker
and enjoy it
James Pankratz
Special to Parenting
Back to Parenting front page
Something's keeping us up at night. A recent national survey revealed nearly two-thirds of adult Americans are getting less than the minimum sleep requirement for good health. And what do physicians generally set as the minimum? Eight hours. The minimum.

Millions of us are awake more than ever before and enjoying it less. It's costing us. So what's compelling us and our children to disregard medical advice and shave off more and more from that precious eight hour minimum?

Let's see if we can round up some of the usual suspects.

Health issues

There are people who want to sleep but can't. Colds and more serious health problems, such as an enlarged prostate, act as unwanted alarm clocks to catapult people out of bed and send them groping for the Kleenex box or bathroom.

Then there are those who can sleep but choose not to. Sleep deprivation results in impaired concentration and performance at work or school, irritability, and slower response time (expressway anyone?). Poor sleep habits for children can lead to health problems for adults, including obesity and heart and respiratory illness.

Anxiety

When we lie down in the quiet of the night, that monster in the closet peeks out. He silently, but persistently, prods us with nagging bits of business we didn't attend to. He nags us to look at the clock to fret at another hour lost, listening to him. Or he may let us fall asleep quickly, only to jab us awake at 2:30 a.m. with an onslaught of nail-biting fear.

Suddenly our mind is like a carbine, spinning furiously with all sorts of things that could go wrong tomorrow. The monster Anxiety pulls out the stops to try to trick us into believing we are helpless to do anything about the tidal wave of catastrophes that he assures us are waiting for us.

One technique for fighting this monster is to get an anxiety notebook. Draw a line down the center of each page. On the left side write down all of Anxiety's threats. On the right side record your plan for dealing with each of them. Just writing down your plan is sometimes enough to deflate Anxiety, whose bark is usually worse than his bite.

Depression

Anxiety's loyal ally is Depression. After Anxiety's been working on you a while, he calls in Depression to try to convince you you're weak and useless, otherwise you wouldn't be putting up with Anxiety. Depression would like you to do a nightly review of all of your sins, shortcomings, and mistakes that he says make you a guilty, despicable, unlikable wretch.

Sleep disturbance is actually a valuable warning sign. It tries to get our attention to solve another underlying problem. Think of it as a barometer, giving us a reading on our emotional and physical health. When we make a plan to address the physical pain, anxiety, or depression, our friend Sleep may return.

Electricity

Never in the history of the world have we been able to so effectively prolong daylight. Our computers, CD players, video games, VCRs, DVD players, and big-screen TVs leave us more entertained and more sleep-deprived than previous generations.

Barking dogs

You owners know who you are. Just bring them inside, OK?

American Asceticism

Ascetics are those who renounce worldly pleasure for virtue's sake. While other cultures take a siesta in the afternoon to recharge themselves, Americans believe a nap is self-indulgent. See what happens if you confess to a group of friends that you routinely get eight-and-a-half hours sleep every night and you've never felt better in your life.

I predict they will congratulate you, but then go on to tell you how they have so many things on their plates they could not possibly do the same. With their litany of activities, they will try to convince you of how busy (i.e. indispensable) they are.

If you get the reputation as a slacker, enjoy it. Cheerfully suggest that they think of something else to give up for Lent this year. Wouldn't you rather be around well-rested and cheerful people than "virtuous," exhausted and irritable ones?

Sleep is not something to give up, sacrifice, or be ashamed of needing. It is a vital, dynamic force with the power to heal and re-energize our weary minds and bodies. It is basic to any physical, emotional, and spiritual health regimen.

Samuel Taylor Coleridge wrote a hymn to sleep in his mysterious poem, "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner."

"Oh sleep! it is a gentle thing
Beloved from pole to pole!
To Mary Queen the praise be given!
She sent the gentle sleep from Heaven
That slid into my soul."


Join the old sailor and take some rest for your voyage, too.

(Pankratz is a Catholic Charities marriage and family therapist at the Milwaukee regional office.)

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